Friday, September 18, 2009
It's fall again. It always comes, and it always does this to me. I'm not sure if I get spring fever, but I do get fall fever. I feel more alive, I want to do things I haven't thought about for who knows how long, and I have more energy to do them.
I listen to music (Toni Childs right now) and feel like a part of me wakes up that has been asleep over the hot, humid summer.
Not that it isn't humid right now, after I've-forgotten-how-many days straight of rain. But it's different, knowing that when these rains end, clear, crisper air will soon be on its way. And knowing the rain is adding to the magic of the leaves turning.
I want to be outside, walking for long periods of time. I'm remembering long walks in the hills of Scandicci in the fall, and I'm thinking of walks in Eureka Springs with the leaves ablaze.
And I want to be inside, too. I want to cook, all of a sudden. I pulled five recipes tonight that look inviting.
I want to curl up and read. Read just for fun--poetry, fiction, meditations. Read things that move beyond the here and now to the out there (and the deeper in there) and eternity.
I want to draw. We got an invitation in the mail today for the opening of an exhibit at the Brooks Museum, which in addition to offering a guided tour with wine and hors'doeuvres, invites us to bring a pencil and sketchbook to sit and "sketch with local artists." Again I remember Italy, how I often did see artists young and old sitting in the museums, sketching away. It was so normal there. I want it to be normal here, too. I think I'll go do it, just for the fun of it.
I want to put the hammock up (once the rains stop) and lie and stare up at the pecan leaves and the blue sky beyond and remember lying in that same hammock, staring up at the sky above Grandmother's yard.
I want to be alive. To really, truly be alive. To suck the marrow out of life, as Thoreau put it.
I'm four days early according to my calendar, but Happy Fall.
(Leaves courtesy of a retreat at St. Columba, three falls ago. Something else I need to get on the calendar for fall.)